


Two Weeks

by kakashisninken



Category: Naruto, Naruto (Anime) RPF
Genre: Alcohol, Angst, Break Up, Cigarette Smoking, Cigarettes, F/M, Healing from past hurt, Hurt, Jealousy, Mentions of Violence, Reader Insert, Reader heals after break up, Reader is a shinobi, Reader is pretty angry, cursing, descriptions of fighting, descriptions of injuries, use of alcohol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-25
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:15:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27614716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kakashisninken/pseuds/kakashisninken
Summary: After your boyfriend of six months leaves you without reason, you find yourself feeling colder and angrier than ever.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Reader
Comments: 18
Kudos: 97





	1. Chapter 1

It started when Kakashi said he didn’t want to be with you anymore and it ended with you telling him he had two weeks to get his stuff out of your house.

When he addressed it, you turned cold. Simply saying  _ ‘okay’ _ . You didn’t  _ need _ to know why he wanted to end it and you didn’t  _ want _ to know why he wanted to end it. The idea of all your mistakes and shortcomings was something you didn’t feel the need to confront. Him leaving you was crushing enough. 

You weren’t normally like this. You were actually very kind and very warm but the second you felt heartache or emotional pain you shut down. Turned cold, dead in the eyes, expressionless. A defence mechanism against hurt. Kakashi didn’t like that side of you but then again it wasn’t his or your problem anymore.

Luckily Kakashi had excellent timing to leave you, you were due to leave for your mission the next day. Two weeks across the country tracking down a rogue-nin. Sounded like a pretty good distraction.

That whole time you were suffocating those feelings down, too numb to cry about anything. You wouldn’t cry about it. He was just another person that left you, just like all the others. Instead you focused on the mission at hand, easier to think about your own survival than some guy who dumped you after you gave him half a year of your life. It made you wonder how long this ache would last, how long would you be this cold and distant for? 

You don’t have time to think about those things, not when you’re blocking kicks and punches. Instead you’re focused on the fight, the opponent, trying to be two steps ahead so you don’t end up dead yourself. Perhaps this wasn’t healthy, taking out your anger on henchmen. With each punch, slash and stab you could feel your anger consume you. Strangely enough, it felt good, felt right. Like some screwed up release.

Even after your team had taken down the rogue-nin, you still felt this unsettling feeling in you. Maybe you would be this way forever now. Living off of anger, being cold and dead inside.

The first and only thought you had as you saw the gates of Konoha in the distance was:  _ he better have his shit out of my house.  _

Giving a wave goodbye to your teammates after you all entered the gates, you were going to go straight home. You needed to bathe and maybe have something proper to eat, it had been two weeks and bathing in rivers wouldn’t cut it compared to a warm shower. 

You couldn’t bring yourself to smile at the kids chasing each other around on the streets, couldn’t bring yourself to smile at the smell of sweet dumplings, couldn’t bring yourself to smile at a mother and her small child holding hands. 

As you turned the corner, now on the street where you lived, you saw two figures in the distance coming in your direction. One of them was a figure you knew all too well. Kakashi. Hands stuffed in his vest pockets, chatting politely. On his side was a very beautiful young woman, maybe just a little older than you were yourself. Dressed sharply and nicely, no headband or vest in sight. This woman wasn’t a shinobi.

_ Didn’t take him long did it? _

Your nose screwed up, feeling sick to your stomach. That idle anger was brewing up again, taking every drop of inner strength not to go up to him and tell him he can shove that six months of your life he wasted up his ass. In the distance you could see your home, you considered it for a moment only to ultimately walk away. Luckily, he hadn’t seen you yet. 

Instead you went straight to the bar. It was getting around six at night so you knew at least Kurenai would be nursing a drink. You were right, Kurenai was sitting in a booth next to Gemna and Iruka. You assumed Asuma would be trailing behind soon. Her face dropped as soon as she saw you.

“(Y/N)! Are you okay?” Kurenai asked as you approached the booth, trying to move as quickly as she could to meet you.

“I’m fine” you said as your backpack rolled off your shoulders and onto the floor.

Sure, Kurenai's panic was warranted. You looked like you had been dragged to hell and back. Your body and face were covered in bruises ranging from dark purples to icy blues to pale yellows. Scratches littered your arms and face as if you had been attacked by a stray cat. A single deep cut on your cheek from when one of the rogue-nin’s henchmen threw a shuriken at you, luckily only grazing you. Dirt smeared on your features. At this point you didn’t care what you looked like, you just wanted a drink.

Kurenai kindly went to get you a drink, the hard stuff because boy did you look like you needed it. Sitting down across from you and sliding it your way she cautiously spoke. 

“So, I heard about you and Kakashi…” 

“Yeah, it is what it is” you said, playing it off like you had lost something minuscule like a pen or a book instead of someone you genuinely loved. 

“Have you seen him since you got back?” Iruka asked, you shook your head as you took a sip of the amber liquid in your glass.

It was strong, burnt slightly on the way down. Not that that mattered, you still were going to down the full glass.

“I don’t really want to talk about Kakashi, it’s old news” you lied through your teeth. It wasn’t old news, that’s why it still hurt. 

“That’s okay! We can talk about something else!” Iruka said, thinking fast on what to change the subject too.

Soon enough Asuma arrived and the party really started. The booth began to laugh and drink and joke around. It was just what you needed, you felt yourself easing up. Maybe it was the company or maybe it was the drink, either way it was working and you were feeling a lot lighter. Your chest didn’t feel as heavy anymore. Maybe you weren’t going to be this way forever.

It was only when you saw the sharp points of spiked silver hair that the sinking feeling came back. What was he doing here?

“I’m going to head off, probably need a good shower” you said as you slung your backpack over your shoulder, receiving ‘ _goodbye_ ’ and ‘ _take care_ ’ from the group.

Kakashi was walking to the same booth you were leaving from. Your head was locked straight ahead, the target was the door. You wouldn’t give Kakashi a side glance, even if you wanted to glare at him. You refused to acknowledge his presence, he certainly knew you were passing in his direction. His eyes looked at you as you approached closer, expecting to be acknowledged only for you to walk by as if he was a stranger. Not the man you loved still. 

It must have stung because as soon as you were out the door and walking down the street, you heard your name being called.

“(Y/N)! (Y/N)!”

You didn’t want to deal with this right now, you just wanted to go home. 

“(Y/N)! Wait up!” Kakashi called for you but you kept walking.

“(Y/N)! Stop!” Finally he was in front of you, hands on your shoulders firmly to stop you from walking away. You shook them off, trying to get past him.

“Did you get your shit out of my house?” You finally spoke, your eyes looking bravely into his.

Kakashi nodded silently. Right then, you heard all you wanted to hear, it was time to go home.

“(Y/N), you look a mess. Have you gone to the hospital?”

“No,” you said plainly, trying to keep walking down the street, “it’s none of your concern” 

“It _is_ my concern” he said as he tried to keep up with your fast pace. The sooner you were home the better.

“No, it really isn’t” you spat, “not anymore”

You were having a hard time trying to supress the anger rising within you. Who did he think he was?

“(Y/N)-“

“Where do you get off? You dumped me and now you’re following me around pretending you care, leave me alone, Kakashi. We’re done” you interrupted him, saying all you wanted to say. This was a warning and he better back off before he gets the full extent of your anger.

“I didn’t leave you because I didn’t care” Kakashi tried to say but you already were walking away, hand up to tell him you didn’t care what he had to say.

“I don’t care” 

Why was this walking taking so long? You didn’t even live that far from the bar. You just wanted to get inside and lock the door, get away from him.

“(Y/N)! I left you because I was scared” 

That got your attention, you turned around to look at him. One hand holding the strap of your backpack tightly.

“I was scared that one day one of us might not come back through those gates” Kakashi said, finally admitting the reason he left you in the first place. 

“It’s done, Kakashi” you didn’t want to hear anymore, turning around to continue walking home.

Why can’t he just respect his own decision? He chose this, he did this. Does he think he can cause all this grief and then come along and try to fix it? You hadn’t even gotten started about his little walk around the village with his pretty girl yet.

Finally your street was coming up and you felt instantly relieved. Kakashi could stand outside your house and say all he wanted once you got home, it wouldn’t matter because you’d be in the shower instead of being forced to listen to him. 

“(Y/N), can you just listen to me?” Kakashi began to plead.

“I’ve heard enough” you said almost as if you were bored of it, tired of it.

Your front door was in sight now and in a few minutes you’d be home and there would be a big wall finally separating you and Kakashi. You couldn’t get there fast enough. Fumbling with your keys, your hands shook as you tried to insert the key quickly. Trying to pay no mind that he was leaning against your door frame, trying to catch your attention.

“(Y/N)” he whispered gently, his fingers under your chin raising your head to look at him, “I made a mistake by leaving you” 

You felt your heart stop as his fingers delicately traced your jawline, lightly touching the bruises and cuts on your face. Finally his thumb made its way to the gash on your cheek. “I’ve made a mess of things haven't I?” he whispered. 

The lock clicked and your door was ready to be opened thankfully. You had no intention of standing out in the cold while Kakashi played games with your mind. Hand twisting the handle, your door opened and you were ready to retreat.

“You did this” you said quietly as you walked inside.

Taking one last look at the man almost in ruins on your doorstep before you closed your front door on him. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to be clear and say this does not have a happy ending (well it does but not like how most people would like it). This is pretty much how this goes, there won’t be a part three or anything. I want to write more Kakashi angst with a proper happy ending in the future. Also I’m sorry but reader picked up a nasty smoking habit whoops. 
> 
> Anyways I hope you enjoy ♥️

Three months had passed since Kakashi broke up with you, two months and two weeks since he followed you home and tried to talk it out. You hadn’t seen him since. It might have been the three week mission you went on as soon as you had finished recouping after the last one. It might have been Kakashi leaving on his own one month mission a couple weeks after you had. When you caught wind that he was back in the village, you spent most of your time indoors or out of the village walls just so you wouldn’t be forced to bump into him.

Those feelings. The anger, the sadness. Turns out they didn’t last forever like you thought they would. You were volunteering yourself for the missions no one else wanted to take, an excuse to get out of the village. Being out there in the world alone was quite healing, something you weren’t exactly expecting. Being out there gave you a lot of time alone to reflect on everything. 

The truth was Kakashi wasn’t the first to leave you. Friends, mentors, comrades, boyfriends. There was this inevitability when it came to others that they would leave you in the end, hoping desperately that every time you met someone new it would be different this time around. It rarely was and you were always left with that hurt and anger to point it was becoming a familiar friend as you picked up the pieces and tried to connect to others again. This cycle, it was tiring. Spending days walking alone in the forest, sleeping in the highest branches of trees gave you time to dissect every small thing surrounding the cycle you found yourself in. Then soon enough the patterns began to emerge and each time you began to realise why this was causing so much pain, you were beginning to heal. Not just from Kakashi but from everything. 

Perhaps you needed to thank Kakashi for leaving you. If he had never left you, you never would have begun healing in the first place. The rage and deep sadness was slowly fading and you felt yourself returning the old you again. Maybe not exactly the old you but a version of yourself that was no longer held in chains by your trauma and past pain. It wasn’t an overnight success, you were still healing but god you felt so much better for it. 

You had moved houses. Extra missions meant extra income and you found yourself needing a fresh space. One that wasn’t filled with memories of an ex boyfriend. It was a necessary move despite it being your first home that you had lived in years before you even got together with Kakashi. One night you were laying awake and you had heard a knock on your bedroom window. The curtains were drawn but there was only one person who would bother to try to get your attention by knocking on your window. He wanted to talk it out even after a month had gone by and you still didn’t. So you rolled over, ignoring the sinking feeling in your stomach as you closed your eyes and tried to drift off. Your heart was still filled with anger when you packed up your belongings but putting them in a new place made your heart feel a whole lot lighter. 

Knocking on your window wasn’t exactly the last attempt from Kakashi to talk to you. One time he had gotten Gai to casually bring it up at one of Genma's card nights. You were angrier back then and shut the idea down completely. After a while there was no avoiding his name in your friends' mouths because he was their friend too. He would be casually mentioned more and more as days and weeks went by. You supposed that helped with the healing too, knowing eventually you would have to be in the same booth with him and all your friends and you would have to get over it  _ or _ you would have to find new friends. 

Out at the bar with the rest of the jonin, no one told you Kakashi was coming too. He had turned up to your booth two hours after you all had met up and you were already five drinks deep. Kotetsu was telling you some ridiculous story about an ostrich when you saw the all too familiar spikes of white hair and the orange book in his hand. 

“I’m going to get some fresh air” you told the group in the booth as you excuse yourself. Their eyes glanced into the direction of the door and noticed Kakashi approaching, understanding why you were trying to escape the booth so quickly.

You took a deep breath as you saw Kakashi walking in your direction. Instead of it being like the last time where you had walked right by him and ignored his existence, this time you looked directly at him. Your eyes met and he was surprised to see you give him a nod of acknowledgement as you passed him by. 

Getting outside into the night air, you made your way down an alley. Rummaging through your vest pocket to find your pack and a lighter. The smoking? That was Asuma’s terrible influence. After a night of feeling miserable and drunk he took you outside and told you to put the damn cigarette in your mouth and get over yourself. Tough love but it worked. They say it only takes one to get you hooked and now you were reaching for one at the smallest inconvenience. Kurenai smacked Asuma’s arm when she saw you chain smoking at the table one night. Told you it would kill you one day. Of course it could kill you one day but who’s to say some crazy bandit in the woods wouldn’t do it before the cigarettes had a chance.

You lit the cigarette hanging out of your mouth and quickly exhaled the first puff, thick smoke lingered in the air. “Since when did you start smoking?”

Exhaling after another puff, your head turned to the voice on your left. It was Kakashi approaching you. You couldn’t help but look up to the sky, hoping maybe it would fall down on you. You weren’t exactly angry with him like the last time you saw each other. You weren’t exactly sad either. When it came to your ex boyfriend, you were indifferent. 

“Maybe a month or so ago” you said as you took a drag. Kakashi was in front of you, desperately trying to find the right words that won’t scare you away. You sighed, smoke streamed out of your nostrils. “I suppose we should talk huh?”

Your back slid down the wall, watching as Kakashi moved to sit next to you on the ground. This might be a long conversation, one you didn’t really want to be standing for. Kakashi had seemed surprised you were the one reaching out instead of telling him where to shove his talk. Perhaps you were so open to the idea due to the drinks in your system.

“I heard from Gai you’ve been seeing other people,” Kakashi said calmly, but looking into his eyes you could see this seemed to have hurt him. You cringed knowing he knew about that, looking away from him as you took another puff of your cigarette.

Gai wasn’t wrong, you had been seeing or had tried to see other people. It was all rebound bullshit that never went past friendly dinners and drinks. You found the company nice but it was like you couldn’t be bothered with everything that came with it. The expectations that it would lead to more, the idea of pretending to be happy with someone else and letting someone in again. They’d walk you home and never receive an invitation inside. You learnt soon after that you couldn’t ease the feelings inside yourself with someone else.

“Even if I was it’s not anything for you to concern yourself with” You said bluntly. It had sounded harsh but it was something you would have preferred he hadn’t known about. In fact it was almost embarrassing.

“So it’s not my concern that the woman I love is seeing other men?”

_ Love _ . That was a word coming out of his mouth that immediately made your stomach turn and your chest tighten. It was a word that invoked such mixed emotions within you. A part of you wanted to remind him in anger that you were not the woman he loved but the woman he lost. Another smaller part wanted to fall into his arms and forget everything that happened, not that you would. You wish he didn’t love you, it would have made this a lot easier. 

You shook your head gently as you tapped the ash off of the cigarette in between your fingers. “It’s not like anything happened...”

This talk was already harder than you imagined and you hadn’t even truly gotten into anything just yet. You both sat with your backs against the dirty brick wall in silence. Puffing on your cigarette, you waited for Kakashi to say something, anything. Soon you realised maybe he just didn’t know where to start. 

“You know, I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said to me the last time we saw each other,” you broke the silence, throwing the burning cigarette butt on the ground, “about how you were scared about one of us not making it through those gates home one day”

Kakashi thoughtfully took in your features. Your lips that he enjoyed kissing. Your nose that he thought complimented your face so perfectly. Your eyes that he loved to look into. You seemed so peaceful versus the last time you saw each other. That peaceful side of you was the one he liked most of all. You noticed his silence and turned towards him to meet his gaze.

“The truth is Kakashi. As a shinobi, that’s our job. To risk our lives for our fellow comrades and the citizens of this village. This is what we signed up for the moment we became genin” you reminded him, “I’ve always been aware of that fact and we both have watched those around us die time and time again. But... it never stopped me from wanting to love you or to connect to others”

“I’m well aware of that. It’s just… I was scared for the first time in a long time about losing someone I cared about. I didn’t want to go through it again” Kakashi explained to you as if you weren’t unaware of his complicated and dark history, as if he hadn’t tried to explain that the last time you saw each other. 

“I just wish you didn’t leave me because of it, you should have just talked to me. We wouldn’t be here otherwise”

“I regret leaving you, I do. You’ve been on mind every day, every minute since I last saw you”

You listened to Kakashi, a slight feeling in your bones that you knew where this was going. Slipping another cigarette in your mouth and lighting it, you took a quick puff before releasing smoke into the air. Chainsmoking was terrible for you but these days so was everything else, besides you were the only one you had to worry about now. If Kakashi found it unattractive then this made your job easier. 

“Kakashi,” you looked at him, gently smiling at him. Almost feeling sorry for him, the look in his eyes told you he wanted to fix things but that wasn’t going to happen the way he wanted them too, “you leaving me was the best thing anyone has ever done for me”

“I- what?” Kakashi's eyes widened, shocked you could even say that. Shaking his head as he tried to absorb your statement. 

“It’s not to say I never loved you, because there is a part of me that still does,” It was heavy to admit out loud but it was the truth, “it’s just… Kakashi you left me without any reason”

“(Y/N), I’m-“ Kakashi tried to apologise but you cut him off. If he wanted you to talk then you were going to talk. 

“I already had abandonment issues before that but with you leaving… it made me face it for the first time” you finished, watching his face drop. Of course he had never intended for any of this to happen but it couldn’t be helped and luckily you were in a better place because of it. 

“I was so angry and so hurt and for the longest time I didn’t know how to fix it. It was like I had been carrying it around with me all this time. Every single thing I had suffered through but you leaving triggered something in me” You said as you took a quick puff of your cigarette, “I’ve been able to heal from it now, not all of it but it’s like I get lighter and lighter every day”

“I should have never done that to you”

Kakashi spoke to you with so much regret for his actions. Almost as if he was attending a pity party for one. It was hard to look at him, Kakashi was like a shell of his former self. 

“You had your reasons” 

“They were pathetic reasons. Pushing you away like that” Kakashi wasn’t facing you as he spoke, instead he stared ahead at the opposite wall.

You couldn’t stand hearing him be so self deprecating about himself. There was a reason you had fallen for him despite what was happening now. He was a funny, kind man. Witty and sarcastic. Seeing him at his low hurt you just as much as he was hurt. Your hand reached for his, giving it a little squeeze. It wasn’t meant to inspire hope within him, that you could fix this just like that. It was intended to comfort him, to show him despite everything you didn’t hate him like he probably thought you did. Kakashi’s head snapped to you, staring at you in sadness. Embracing your touch, one he hadn’t felt in so long. His free hand instantly came on top of yours, almost holding you in place like he didn’t want you to let go. 

“I love you, I realise that more than ever. (Y/N), can we start over? We were good together before I screwed it all up. I just want to get back to how things were” Kakashi asked of you but it wasn’t a request you could give into so easily. 

“Kakashi,” you sighed, “I don’t think you should be with anyone let alone with me”

You gave his hand another squeeze before moving it away from him, needing another cigarette. Kakashi put up no fight, respecting you removing your hand from his own. 

“If what you’re saying is true then you left me because you were scared of what has happened to everyone else and please don’t be upset with me, Kakashi, but I think you should really work on that” You said as you rummaged around your pockets for your lighter.

You meant it sincerely. You told him he needed to work on his problems because you cared enough about him. You cared enough about him to tell him the raw truth. He couldn’t run from the blatant truth just as you couldn’t. The world had not been kind enough to allow him to heal from past hurt but it was time he did. Kakashi was silent, taking in what you were saying to him. Silently he agreed. There had been problems he was avoiding, running from all his life and age just wasn’t making it easier like one thought it might. 

“I mean, maybe after you’ve sorted yourself out we could give it another go. In the future...” you said as you lit another cigarette, trying to remember if this was your third or fourth one, “But I don’t want to have to avoid you around the village. Eventually we’re going to have to work together again” 

It wasn’t exactly an empty promise or false hope. There was a little part of you that loved him enough to wait for him. Not that you were going to explicitly wait for him; it's just that you didn't see yourself with anyone in the far future. It was time to focus on the only person who was never going to leave your side. You. Still you hoped that Kakashi could make peace with himself. Not for you or for a potential reconciliation in the future but for himself because he deserved to be at peace. Especially after the life he lived. 

You stood from the wall, feeling like you had said enough and now you needed another drink. With one hand holding your cigarette, your other offered to help Kakashi stand. A gesture to symbolise a new beginning for the both of you. Kakashi looked at your hand for a moment, glancing between your hand and your face. You looked down at him softly, calmly. Waiting for him to take your hand.

“Do you mean that?” He asked you, still sitting on the ground.

“Mean what?” You asked for clarification, your hand still reached out for him.

“That maybe we could work this out… if I work on myself first” 

“I won’t promise you anything but… maybe we could. I don’t see why not” you said to him. Your eyebrows gestured for him to take your hand, you were tired of holding it out to him.

Kakashi sighed and for the first time in a long time you saw a gentle smile on his face, his hand reaching for yours. Gripping tightly as you helped him up. You smiled too, feeling relief that you could come to an understanding. That all this awkwardness and hurt was over, you both could move forward now.

You and Kakashi walked back to the bar, side by side in silence. As you walked up the steps to the entrance of the bar, your hand gently came down on Kakashi’s shoulder. Kakashi stopped to look back at you as you smiled gently at him, in turn he smiled back at you with the same gentleness. Things were beginning to feel okay. Your hand dropped to your side and Kakashi walked in front of you, back into the bar to join both of your friends for a drink once more. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> So when I was writing this I kind of wanted to touch on the more healing parts of break ups. Finding yourself afterwards and making peace with yourself and everything else. I didn’t want reader to instantly go back to Kakashi, I wanted reader to heal and I didn’t want them to go backwards when the truth is Kakashi has a lot of shit to work on himself. It kinda wasn’t fair for Kakashi to leave reader and come back like whoops so... yeah hahaha. But like also reader doesn’t hate Kakashi, they still love him and they understand why he did it (after a very long reflection period hdhdhd) and because of that they want him to help himself too. 
> 
> Anyways thank you for reading and for commenting (in advance I am so sorry I am just terrible at replying to comments) and I hope you liked it ♥️

**Author's Note:**

> howdy yall, thanks for reading ❤️ this was just a quick short one shot bc I love my angst. I posted it ages ago on tumblr but thought I’d post it here


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